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sugerbabe05

Joined: 9/23/2005

What should I do about a boyfriend that won't do oral? He said that he has had bad experiences in the past and won't do it... Yet I do it on him.... He hasn't even tried with me yet and we have been together 4 months.

Posts: 30

Posted 9 years ago
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*Sliver!*

Joined: 4/25/2005

If he doesn't do it, you don't do it. He'll either start doing it, or he'll get pissed cause he's not getting his own way and leave.


If he does the latter, you find a new boyfriend.

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Posted 9 years ago
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sugerbabe05

Joined: 9/23/2005

Alrighty... makes sense... I have said that before and he said, "well i do my job during sex, so you still get off... whats the big deal"

Posts: 30

Posted 9 years ago
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*Sliver!*

Joined: 4/25/2005

Typical guy who doesn't listen. If he doesn't give a shit about your needs he's not worth being with.

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Posted 9 years ago
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sugerbabe05

Joined: 9/23/2005

alrighty thank you hun... next time with him i will just have to have a talk with him

Posts: 30

Posted 9 years ago
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*Sliver!*

Joined: 4/25/2005

There ya go. Relationships are supposed to be 50/50.


And you're very welcome, glad I could help.

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Posted 9 years ago
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Kajunqueen

Joined: 11/29/2008

Maybe you should talk to him about his "bad experiences"...Some guys just don't like it. One turn off is odor...Or maybe hair. Tell him your not the one who gave him the bad experience and it would mean alot to you for him to be open and honest to you about it. Heck,maybe he thinks he is no good at it(?).
I had a neighbor that complained about the same issue and I think they got a vibrator,lmao.If you truly love him,don't let one little problem cause you to lose a good person.

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Posted 9 years ago
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sugerbabe05

Joined: 9/23/2005

Thanks... ya i mean he is right that he still gets the job done... i just know how much oral can be a turn on and fun before the sex ya know? so if we could both get into to before it would make it better... maybe i could say something like that? I mean I care about him alot and would never break up with him over this.

Posts: 30

Posted 9 years ago
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*Sliver!*

Joined: 4/25/2005

As long as your needs are being met, by all means stay with the man. But if he refuses to listen to what you want yet expects you to give him what he wants, he's not worth being with.

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Posted 9 years ago
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sugerbabe05

Joined: 9/23/2005

yeah I understand that.... I know it shouldnt be give and no receive... I will just talk to him and see where it gets me :) Thankies

Posts: 30

Posted 9 years ago
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*Sliver!*

Joined: 4/25/2005

Anytime.

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Posted 9 years ago
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strikersprint

Joined: 5/23/2007

Reply to: yeah I understand that.... I know it shouldnt be give and no receive... I will ...
If the guy is attracted to you. You think he would go nuts doing any thing sexual.

Posts: 19

Posted 9 years ago
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sugerbabe05

Joined: 9/23/2005

Well he does with everything but that... He told me he had a really bad experience with it and it completely turned him off from it and he hasnt done it since.

Posts: 30

Posted 9 years ago
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mzztatt

Joined: 1/30/2007

Reply to: Well he does with everything but that... He told me he had a really bad experie...
i can understand the bad experience part BUT he needs to also understand that you are not the bad experience he had...and that he needs to give you a chance. he definitely needs to explain what happened and then go from there and work slowly into it so that this is a good experience for him and that whatever happened the fist time doesnt get repeated.

If he is adamant that he wont do it no matter what then he is not being reasonable. You have needs also and it is obviously something you want/need during sex and you have every right to have it in return also...especially when you are giving it to him.

He cant be selfish about it like that without at least talking thru it and starting fresh with you and giving you a chance. It shouldnt always be about what what turns just HIM on...you are in this sexual relationship too and he should think of your needs also. You can always get him worked up after if it does turn him off by giving him oral...i'm sure that would respark his pecker LOL

as it would for 99% of men in the world. LOL

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Posted 9 years ago
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Silver2009

Joined: 5/15/2009

If you plan to talk with him about that ask him if baiting his dick off would count as even worse experience then the one he has about performing an oral on girl.

WTF could he experience that is so bad? Got squirted on, smelly pussy or he sucked dick by mistake? Seriously?

Posts: 81

Posted 9 years ago
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mzztatt

Joined: 1/30/2007

um...i wont repeat the horrifying stories i've had the unfortunate mispleasure of hearing from men from time to time in my adult life but believe me there's some gawd awful thing's ive heard (some of which i've busted out laughin and others i about puked!).

Squirting isnt considered unpleasant for most men unless its not the right kind LOL...two, smelly would be the start of the horrid experience with much worse to follow from what i've heard from men..LMFAO @ sucked dick by mistake (cross dresser/tranny?)

appare ntly she doesnt know his bad experience hence everyones suggestion to ask him n talk about it n go from there...keeping in mind to NOT repeat whatever it was that was so bad if he's willing to try with her n give her a chance to make it a good experience for him lol

Posts: 1265

Posted 9 years ago
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Silver2009

Joined: 5/15/2009

Reply to: um...i wont repeat the horrifying stories i've had the unfortunate mispleasure ...
Well you are right as always.

There is horrific stories out there and I could tell you a few myself, yet it does not stop (I almost "stooped" that one too :) me from doing what I like doing.

Unless it's a rancid and diseased (in which case I would not touch it with 15' long pole let alone have an intercourse), there is nothing about smelly that cannot be fixed with soap, water and nice shower together.

It is just that this type of an excuse pisses me off. It is the most common BS that I hear around to protect some macho BS rant "Ooh, I do not ever go down on girl, I just like my dick sucked."
Like no woman ever had a horrific story of her own and yet still willing to perform oral for the person they love.

For love of God, he's been with this girl for 4 months and he still does not "know" her?

Posts: 81

Posted 9 years ago
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mzztatt

Joined: 1/30/2007

lmao @ stooped...ur a funny guy.

oh ya...women have our stories too! lmfao

ya...it is pretty lame and seems someone's always got an excuse of some kind dont they...women do too.

so many selfish people in the world ya know....and selfish behavior doesnt make for a long lasting nor a good relationship.

lol @ know her...apparently not like he should if he were a good man.

Posts: 1265

Posted 9 years ago
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Silver2009

Joined: 5/15/2009

Reply to: lmao @ stooped...ur a funny guy. oh ya...women have our stories too! lmfao ya...
Thanks,
yeah I got mu moments once in a Blue Moon. :)

It seems that everybody got an excuse for something. Looks to me if everybody spent more time getting to know each other instead wasting a time on making up an excuses it would be a much better world for all of us.

Selfishness was never a good personality trait, yet it appears to be prevailing in this "modern" world. Too bad. :(

Posts: 81

Posted 9 years ago
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Kajunqueen

Joined: 11/29/2008

Reply to: Thanks, yeah I got mu moments once in a Blue Moon. :) It seems that everybody ...
Good post Silver..And if they are in a LASTING relationship,they have THE REST OF THEIR LIVES to get to know each other and figure out what each can do to make their sex life THE BEST...I agree that their are too many people that give up too quickly instead of being open and honest. We are not mind readers and just spitting out what bothers you is a good start,then something should be done about it,if nothing is done,one person feels like they don't matter and that is where things go down hill.

Posts: 6567

Posted 9 years ago
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Silver2009

Joined: 5/15/2009

Reply to: Good post Silver..And if they are in a LASTING relationship,they have THE REST ...
Thanks KQ.

Communication is apparently key to everything.
That's why I always say, you got to be more oral in the relationship. :D

Posts: 81

Posted 9 years ago
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Kajunqueen

Joined: 11/29/2008

Reply to: Thanks KQ. Communication is apparently key to everything. That's why I always ...
LOL...Nicely put!

Posts: 6567

Posted 9 years ago
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What Sanity

Joined: 5/9/2009

Could go either way, maybe he did have a bad experience or maybe he is like a lot of the guys who use that sentence to get out of doing something that requires a little more effort.

Totally talk about it with him.

Posts: 1552

Posted 9 years ago
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citygal70

Joined: 9/11/2009

Reply to: Could go either way, maybe he did have a bad experience or maybe he is like a l...
I was with someone a few years ago that was the same way. He refused to do it no matter what I did for him. Personally, oral is a deal braker for me. I was really into this guy, so finally asked him to explain himself. His reason was the woman he was with before me was all natural, had an oder, and passed gas when he was down there. I took him by the hand to the bathroom, I allowed him to shave me (I was already trimed. Also, if you allow someone else to shave you, make sure you use alot of cream and they go slow.) I allowed him to wash me. Then I asked him to trust me that I would not pass gas. He hesitated, then proceded to give me oral. He did do it a couple more times before we agreed our relationship just wasnt working. Lesson to be learned here is, just try and talk to him. Don't pressure him to do anything he does not want, but if it is important to you, then do what you need to do.

Posts: 1

Posted 9 years ago
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Nunnyah

Joined: 3/16/2009

Let's face it, this guy has excuses up the u kno what! Honestly though there are much too many types of STD's out there theses day.... So whatever your choice is please be safe and make good ones!

Oh Oh, It's time to go eat @ the "Y"......

Posts: 43

Posted 9 years ago
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