my experiences have left me with a sour taste in my mouth.The meer thought that after ending every relationship and the starting a new one...most of what i brought to the table is the pain of the past in which it literally destroys the present relationship im trying to begin...so my thought..no my question is this...is there ever a way to let go fully the past and start anew with the present...without the reminder of constant past sins.

You ask the million dollar question, my friend. Our subconscious mind has been like a vacuum cleaner, sucking up all the negativity of the last, and then blowing it out all over the present. We haven't a chance - it happens automatically without any thinking at all. Most people continue on, as before, or they will change some little detail in their life or attitude and hope that it is the cure. It's not. There are many good books on changing attitudes that can be found on Amazon and in book stores. Remember, what you want is what you'll get, so when your thoughts are free of the garbage of the past, you'll be on the road to a great life.

mr miller thank u.

Yes... I was experiencing the same. Always doing for others and placing my own happiness second. The past can never be fully forgotten, but you have to leave it in the past. I once read of stories of women having divorce parties where they would burn their wedding dresses as a symbol of moving on. Guys tend to internalize their feelings and may feel less masculine grieving. My advice is seek another outlet for past relationship mishaps, and not burden your next significant other with them at the beginning. Down the road after a more formidable relationship is nurtured sure, its ok to include your new love interest on what happened... But enjoy the newness of a clean slate to start. Find a friend, professional or clergy person to talk about what went wrong... But don't make this the focal point of ALL the new things u have going right with someone new.

Your comments and your advice are both very good. Talking with someone about problems is always helpful and often cathartic. It is very common in a new relationship to dump all over the new person with your life "story", and that is usually the kiss of death. Not always, but usually. So, watch your mouth (ha ha,) keep your mind on the present,and let the future unfold for you.

Your comments and your advice are both very good.  Talking with someone about problems is always helpful and often cathartic.  It is very common in a new relationship to dump all over the new person with your life "story", and that is usually the kiss of death. Not always, but usually.  So, watch your mouth (ha ha,) keep your mind on the present,and let the future unfold for you.

Thanks Jimbo... Your 1st impression of me was an accurate one. (B4 the Captain & Tenial pissed In my Cheerios).

ROTFLMAO!!!! You never lose your touch. Well done again. BTW, I regard The Captain and LittleRoxy highly. Although "unique", they make good sense. And Tennille was special too. She had to be, to be married to Carmen Dragon's kid.

you're very very strange..haha

usted no tiene ningun sentido en tedos los

u never really ever forget the one's in ur past or stop loving them, because the day u stop loving them will mean u never really loved them at all cause Love never dies..

When we love someone, alot of times the best way to show it is to not only let them use their own wings to fly in life, but is also to encourage them to fly as well. Loving someone new is'nt about keeping that person all to yourself so that the world is'nt able to see their light shine, but instead holding them up to a candle to the world to create more light for them. Seeing someone from your past that you truly loved happy should make you feel a thousand times more fulfilled than them being happy themselves alone..

Roxy, you speak the truth. Although it is sometimes hard to admit to that love, because some relationships end with great pain, it is as it is. Over the years, my attitude has changed about those I've loved and my perspective has changed with my own personal growth. Today, I see with different eyes, so to speak, and realize that some relationships just couldn't have been, no matter how much one or both of us wanted it to be. Nevertheless, since love is the greatest force of all, it is pointless to deny it.

Whooohaw! That goes directly to the point of whether we really live for other than our own selfish interests or not. I see so much manipulation and power crap in relationships, it's no wonder they never grow, expand and mature. It's all about "what's in it for me", which I believe is the kiss of death. One word says it all - Namaste = when the God in you sees the God in me, we are One. Buddha said many cool things, too, as did Mother Teresda and Gandhi.

Sister Teresa was my grade school principle. The convent in those days was still a functioning entity of the Catholic Church. On "special" occasions detentions were held in the Nuns "honeycomb hideout!" For obvious reason my smart mouth, yes its true, even reared its head back in my youth got me in much trouble. Sister Teresa believed in paddling. However at 12 I found my talent of being able to say the right things to drive her crazy. Little did she realize (@first) how much I enjoyed being paddled.

Well, i have read most of the comments to your question from the other people. i agree with some, some as usual in the forums get side tracked from the real issue at hand. NO! we as humans will never totally forget the bad things we have experienced in live. how our future will turn on is based upon how we handle the past. LOL! today when you decide to go to the store or what ever in your car, put your car in reverse and drive to the store in reverse. I no what you thinking now well, you are thinking i am an idiot. NO! Case and point here is that if you are driving your life in reverse, you will never go forward. Good Luck! Go forward then shift into high gear.

Well, i have read most of the comments to your question from the other people. i agree with some, some as usual in the forums get side tracked from the real issue at hand. NO! we as humans will never totally forget the bad things we have experienced in live. how our future will turn on is based upon how we handle the past. LOL! today when you decide to go to the store or what ever in your car, put your car in reverse and drive to the store in reverse. I no what you thinking now well, you are thinking i am an idiot. NO! Case and point here is that if you are driving your life in reverse, you will never go forward. Good Luck! Go forward then shift into high gear.

i mite be only 19, but this is wat i believe; --- Everyone keeps saying love hurts, but thats not true!!! Loneliness hurts,Rejection hurts,Losing someone hurts,Envy hurts.Everyone gets these things confused with love,because in reality love is the only thing in this world that covers up all pain an mistakes.Love is the only thing in this world that does not really hurt.
The only people that we truly need in our lives are those who will respect us an want us enough to be in their life. Living life to try to live up to someone else's standards is not only degrading to ourselves, but it also puts our mental freedom in the hands of a person who could care less about whether we are happy or not.In order to really avoid situstions like these, we have to be stronge an smart enough to recognize the one's who really don't care about us when it comes down to it....... Anyone Agree ???

all experiences make us who we are. hopefully we learn to know what to watch out for and we also improve ourselves to be better in future relationship.
i have heard people say "i wish i had never met so and so." i never say that as i wouldn't have had some of my kids for one thing but it also made me appreciate what i have now and live to protect that i don't lose it.

Word for word, Roxy, I agree with all that you have said. Trying to live to meet the expectations of others is the cardinal sin, although Mother Teresa might not rank that at the top of her list. :-) Maybe Vinnie remembers?

Free will is always our choice but social shit panders that to nothingness and gives us license to be impotent and powerless and secondary. Sucks!

i don't think Vinnie has learned to wipe his Butt yet..lol

i don't think Vinnie has learned to wipe his Butt yet..lol

I would not oppose your statement one bit, Roxy. But it was a provocative thought when I typed it. tee hee.

I agree with you Roxy