Home > Forum > Ask a Girl > Sex after a long distance relationship
  • 1
Page:
AuthorPost

mskiwi82

Joined: 7/9/2008

I have a question to other grown women. Hint the term "GROWN WOMEN" please no childish responses please. I have only been with one man sexually. He turned out to be my husband, I decided I was no longer happy so I left. Now I have been talking to this guy long distance for about 2 1/2 months. We plan to meet face to face next weekend. I have to admit I have been having sexual thoughts about him. I am afraid when we meet I might act on those desires.

So my question is, how long is long enough to date long distance before sex is an option? Or should I just control my urges and actually "date" before going there?

Women I need help with this.

Posts: 30

Posted 9 years ago
Rate: Up | 0 | Down
Reply

*Sliver!*

Joined: 4/25/2005

I think you should at least spend a few days with him before jumping into bed the moment you meet.

Posts: 24442

Posted 9 years ago
Rate: Up | 0 | Down
Reply

mskiwi82

Joined: 7/9/2008

Reply to: I think you should at least spend a few days with him before jumping into bed t...
Thanks, although the plan was never to just jump his bones the moment we lay eyes on one another. But we are going to be together for a little more than a week. Like I said this is all so new to me. I just don't want to make the mistake of sleeping with him, and then nothing comes of it. I am so not that type of person. Again thanks.

Posts: 30

Posted 9 years ago
Rate: Up | 0 | Down
Reply

*Sliver!*

Joined: 4/25/2005

I don't know babe, I don't think sex can actually make or break a relationship.

If it does than it was never much of a relationship to begin with.

Posts: 24442

Posted 9 years ago
Rate: Up | 0 | Down
Reply

Manny068

Joined: 7/7/2005

Being you have only been with one man, I'm sure the curiosity and urges are going to be there for you. Don't feel pressured into having sex just because you can. The fact you've only been talking to him for 2 1/2 months is enough for me to say wait. If he's really into you and visa versa, what's the hurry? Find out how much you truly like eachother and have in common. See where your relationship is headed. Sex can be a huge commitment in a relationship. And as the previous posts states, it can make OR break it. No need to hurry!!!

Posts: 143

Posted 9 years ago
Rate: Up | +2 | Down
Reply

notreally

Joined: 4/15/2005

Im sure Im going to take heat for this one, but i think if it feels right and your sure you want to, go for it. Let it be your decision tho . Dont sleep with him cause you feel you should or your let him talk you into it. Truth be told , most people know almost immediately if they are or arent going to sleep with someone once they meet. If you are sure and you can emotionally handle it if things dont work out, I say follow your instincts.

Posts: 996

Posted 9 years ago
Rate: Up | 0 | Down
Reply

kurasake

Joined: 4/9/2008

Hmmmm the trivial questions that ponders one's mind, hmm hmm hmmm, lol I had an experience like this before, but nothing happened which suxed, either I rushed things, or just wasn't meant to be, I mean we planned and planned to meet but never did, but I've gotta ask, Have you guys talked on the phone at all? I mean with my long distance relationship I had, we talked for like 3 hours on the phone, and then chatted online for like 4, and then when I got a cellphone txted half the night lol, sometime's we did talk about sex, and all the fantasies of what we would do, but, for me sex is a major type thing and sometime's not, like many said it can make or break ya, the first thing on my whole mind on our long distance was still to this day, "How good a kisser we would both be..." so start there before makin the big plunge ^_^ I hope I helped.....sorry i'm a guy, and most of my friends are women I just hoped I helped from a guys perspective.

Posts: 9

Posted 9 years ago
Rate: Up | 0 | Down
Reply

Blakwulf

Joined: 12/28/2008

 If you are sure and you can emotionally handle it if things dont work out, I say follow your instincts. 
I Totally agree, notreally.

I'm not so sure about the comment above regarding SEX "not being able to make or break a relationship" unless there wasn't one in the 1st place- maybe just *me*, but I enjoy sex. I enjoy it quite a bit, and if the enjoyment cannot be mutual, it's going to lead to frustration & maybe more than a little heartbreak if/when Cinderella tells me that Joe Nextdoor makes her *nut* repeatedly in bed, while I make her want to change the channel.

Not that that has ever happened to me... but you get the idea. ;)

If you can make me have an orgasm, I'll put up with a lot. If you don't get me off, I *AM* going to look for a girl that can & will- a LOT. :b That being said, if we don't have good pillow-talk/convo's then I will be here at Webdate, getting some more intellectual stimulus.

Either way, (imho as usual), the enjoyment should be mutual for the relationship to work, and until you have experienced each other sexually, physically, emotionally, intellectually, AND honestly...
There's NO WAY of knowing how much of an investment in any of those areas you'll have to make to get what YOU want/need.

And that's the bottom-line, cuz STONE COLD SAYS SO!!!!!!
*sound of breaking glass*

Oh, wait a minute - wrong forum.
Never mind :D

Posts: 233

Posted 9 years ago
Rate: Up | 0 | Down
Reply

stargreen

Joined: 2/23/2005

My advice to you is to concentrate getting to know him in person first. Just wait, and if it is right it will happen. You can't undo a first time for you two as a couple!

Posts: 40

Posted 9 years ago
Rate: Up | 0 | Down
Reply

A little less t...

Joined: 8/25/2008

Mskiwi,
I would have to pretty much agree with what everyone has said, I have viewed your profile and you appear to be a very strong women with a good head so to speak on your shoulder's... We can all give you good or bad advice, But the real answer is within yourself :O),Even thought I don't know you, I do believe you will make the right choice for yourself and what your conscious will permit you to handle...I hope you both, have a very enjoyable visit. I also hope he turn's out to be the man he has led you to perceive him to be.

P.S....Could you be so kind to share with me , how you were able to make your photo's into a slide show?
Thanks ahead of time.

Posts: 321

Posted 9 years ago
Rate: Up | +1 | Down
Reply

niceman91212

Joined: 12/14/2008

well
its happened to me with my ex gf , and my advice to u take it easy , cause u are the one know the person u will meet and u know every thnigs about him , so when u will meet him u will know what u will do

Posts: 16

Posted 9 years ago
Rate: Up | 0 | Down
Reply
Back to Top
  • 1
Page: